In a previous post, I shared insights for parents who have a teen experiencing depression. This post is a follow up meant to provide more information on recognizing and addressing two challenging topics associated with teen depression: self-harm and suicide. I hope to provide information on these areas for parents to feel empowered in understanding and discussing these things with their teens.
Self-harm is also known as self-injury or self-mutilation, and it refers to any act that deliberately inflicts harm or injury on oneself. This might include cutting, burning, skin or hair picking, or not letting wounds heal. Self-harm is not a mental illness, but a behavior that indicates severe emotional distress and need for better coping skills.
Parents might see this behavior and again ask, "Why?". There are actually a few possible answers to that question. Self-harm can offer a visual representation of the unseen emotional pain, or it might offer a moment to feel something “real” if they experience emotional numbness. Self-harm also feels like a release because it stimulates the body’s endorphins or pain-killing hormones which will elevate mood temporarily. While self-harm is associated with depression, it is not necessarily linked to suicidal intent.
Suicide rates in teens have increased significantly in the last decade, which is not meant to scare
you, but to bring awareness to the real threat that untreated depression poses for youths. Risk
factors for suicide include:
Depression
Bullying
Loss of a loved one
Alcohol/drug misuse.
Trauma
Previous attempt
Warning signs can be hard to spot without doing some digging, and it is important to recognize passive versus active suicidality. Active suicide would look like having intent to die and a detailed plan (ie. I’m giving away my favorite clothes, I will take pills and go to bed tonight to never wake up”). Passive suicide would have less planning or intent, and might look like “I hope a car hits me on the way to school” or “What if I just don’t wake up tomorrow?”. Both passive and active suicidal thoughts are serious and need to taken seriously. More information on warning signs of suicide are included in the resources at the end of this blog.
If your teen has expressed suicidal thoughts, please seek professional help. If you notice marks on your teen that seem unusual, address it with them immediately and connect them with a qualified therapist or mental health provider. Having conversations about these issues will not increase your child’s risk of suicide or self-harm. In fact this will allow you to better know where your teen is in their thoughts and feelings, and whether or not a safety plan is needed in your home.
I have included additional resources for parents and teens below, including crisis hotlines and safety planning templates. Safety planning is a preemptive measure to be taken so that if a person is in active crisis they have clear steps on what to do. This could include warning signs, coping strategies, who to call, where to go, and how to tell when the crisis has ended. A safety agreement template is also included below, which is helpful for searching rooms or electronics when a person is in crisis. I also cover more information about the topic of teen depression and safety checks in a video presentation that can be found here.
Additional Resources for Parents & Teens
Crisis numbers - 988 Suicide & Crisis Hotline
Safety Plan Template
Safety Check Agreement
Suicide Warning Signs Fact Sheet
References
Jean M Twenge, Why increases in adolescent depression may be linked to the technological environment, Current Opinion in Psychology, Volume 32, 2020,Pages 89-94,ISSN 2352-250X, https://doi.org/10.1016/j.copsyc.2019.06.036
Mojtabai R, Olfson M, Han B. National trends in the prevalence and treatment of depression in adolescents and young adults. Pediatrics. 2016;138(6). doi:10.1542/peds.2016-1878
S.N. Ghaemi, Digital depression: a new disease of the millennium? First published: 18 January 2020 https://doi.org/10.1111/acps.13151
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